Sometimes, life feels like an out-of-control mess. We want to fix it, but we don’t know where to start.
If it feels like all bad habits have descended on us at once — procrastination, smartphone addiction, lethargy, low energy, lack of confidence — what do we do?
We want to fix all of them, and often, instantly.
Bad idea. Instead, do the following:
- Give yourself 3 months. Because nothing will happen in an instant. Without patience, you will only add to your frustration.
- Build one keystone habit. Charles Duhigg defines a keystone habit as one that triggers a cascade of positive changes.
I suggest you pick from the following keystone habits:
— Morning meditation
— Workout, running (ideally, alternate between them)
— Focused learning for an hour a day
Here is my video on keystone habits: https://lnkd.in/gafYEtmc
Now work on your chosen keystone habit for 6-8 weeks, achieving 80-90% consistency. It will trigger a domino effect:
- It will break your negative self-beliefs — you will know that when you put your mind to something, you can do it. You are not helpless.
- When you build these habits (e.g., morning workout), your brain releases neurotransmitters like dopamine, norepinephrine, serotonin, and BDNF. They will lift you out of low moods and give you a sense of win.
- As your sense of achievement kicks in, your mind will automatically start rejecting bad habits. E.g., on the days I do a long run, I automatically don’t feel like doing any random snacking.
Don’t try to build 10 different habits in one go — it won’t work. Start with one habit and like a flywheel, it will gather momentum. One or two months later, pick another habit.
In one year’s time, you will look back with wonder. None of this is easy, but it is all very doable.
The key is to not intellectualize — just pick one habit and start.
– Rajan